I was going to wow you with a punched up version of “Why all your wireless stuff doesn't always work” as well as a few other related tidbits. But then I stopped by Fred Lapides' site (NSFW) and realized I had to chuck that idea until tomorrow. Instead I will be regaling you with a video that explains The History Of English...In Ten Minutes.
I couldn't have done any better myself. But he did miss two very important variants of English: Spanglish and Japlish.